D.O.N.T. - Die to Self vs. Self Care

I’ve found that people are very confused about this, and it is crucial to understand the difference between "die to self" and "self-care" for mental and emotional well-being. The church unintentionally reiterates a broken perspective regarding dying to self, but it’s simple to sort out and understand with these 4 factors. Let me give it an acronym … how about DON’T (but forget the apostrophe.) Yes, I like that—as in, don’t confuse the two.   

D

Die to self means to recognize the soulish desires you have that go against God’s will for your life. When you recognize them, let them completely die within you. With God’s help, you can do this. (Math 16-14, Mark 8:34, Luke 9:23, Galatians 2:20) 

O

Own your soulish desires, and actively ask God to search your heart and find any harmful way in you. This is like going to the doctor for a scan. Take time to go to the Great Physician for this. (Psalm 139:23-24, 1 Chronicles 4:9-10, Mark 2:17)  

N

Now, ask, “What are my unmet needs and how do I take care of them? When God reveals unmet needs, say to yourself, “I’m going to take care of you in this unmet need.” (1 Corinthians 3:16, Matthew 11:28, 1 Peter 3:4, Philippians 4:19, Psalm 107:9, Matthew 6:33, Ephesians 2:10) 

T

Take care of the needs as God reveals and instructs you to. Over time, you won’t believe what a difference this makes. The irony is, this greatly helps you die to self. (Mark 1:35, Mark 12:31, 1 Timothy 4:8, 3 John 1:2, Mark 6:31, Psalm 139:13-14, Proverbs 4:23, 2 Timothy 1:2)

A few years ago, I was having coffee with a friend, telling her about the overall message of my musical projects, “Return to Love.” She said, “You know, Jill, sometimes that means returning to loving yourself. I will never forget that. We cannot love others well if we do not love ourselves through the eyes of God, not man. We have to let God show us the parts of us that need to die, as well as the parts that need to LIVE! 

Love to all,

Jill Riley

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